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It's a question Asian Australian filmmaker Tony Ayres highlighted 20 years ago in his documentary China Dolls, during an era when guys used to hook up through published personals ads. As a teenager, I remember watching China Dolls on late night television.

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It made me question my own place in the world. For many gay guys, especially in an image-conscious city like Sydney, it's hard not to feel the pressure of being like the hypermasculine men at the gym, walking around, shaking bottles of protein supplements.

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Yes it has, when you don't want to be seen as a particular stereotype. Eric has been on the dating scene for a couple of years and has become more ripped since I first met him several years ago.

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His abs would probably strike envy in many men. I wore big, thick black glasses. I am who I am and I'm happy with that.

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Even though David may have reached a certain level of "hotness", he still gets backhanded compliments. He's not just hot, he's "hot for an Asian". Hang on a minute. Because I'm Asian you're expecting that it wasn't going to be hot? A couple of guys I spoke to for this story were reluctant to go on the record.

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Their experiences had damaged their wellbeing. They ditched the apps or stopped going out. I've always thought I'm ugly," he says. Matt used to be drawn into tense debates with other app users. Now he blocks or ignores the ones he doesn't like and focuses on the good things in his life. That's probably a better option than being glued to your phone, to your screen, to the addictive party lifestyle that is Sydney.

There are good people out there," he says. For me, I'm certainly seeing more guys using inclusive messages on their profile like "Sexy is sexy", "I'm open to all races" or "No racist bullshit". Whenever Matt sees messages like these, he says "it boosts me. Compatible Partners is not your average gay dating site.

Setting Australia’s LGBTI agenda since 1979

At Compatible Partners, we are committed to helping gay Asian singles find love every day. The traditional gay dating site model, offering only picture and profile browsing, can be ineffective for those gay singles looking for a long-term relationship - love that lasts. At Compatible Partners, we deliver more than personal ads. We get to know you personally through our online Relationship Questionnaire. Then we utilize patented matching technology developed by the scientists at eHarmony to match you with like-minded gay singles.


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This matching system narrows the field from thousands of candidates to a select group of gay singles with whom you can build a relationship that lasts. Once Compatible Partners has matched you with someone who really shares these key traits, its guided communication techniques allow the two of you to really develop a connection, while also discovering things about yourself.

Isn't it time you experienced the joy of falling in love with someone who sees you, loves you, and accepts you for who you are? Once you've completed the questionnaire, you will receive your FREE Personality Profile and at that time, our matching system will begin pre-screening gay singles against your profile.


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  4. Once matched, review your matches, and choose the payment plan you prefer. Now you're ready to begin communication with your matches. Curious to see with whom you'll be matched?